Category Archives: Christmas comedy.

Christmas charts

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If you thought the major battle for the number one spot in the charts was going to be the Army wives versus X-factor winners Little Mix well think again. Having listened to Chris Moyles morning shows on Radio 1 I can’t stop singing ‘Dominick the Donkey,’ complete with  ‘eee orrr, eee orrr.’  I now fully support Moyles’ efforts to get our new four legged friend to overtake his female rivals.


Dominick the donkey.

Dominick the donkey.

 

 
 

Christmas adverts.

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There’s less than a week left of Christmas adverts so before the Cadbury’s Cream eggs hit the screen, I can still enjoy the John Lewis advert, you know the one I mean. It’s the one featuring the angelic looking little boy who can’t wait to give his parents their Christmas present.

The John Lewis Christmas advert 2011.



Just to prove ‘what a difference the sound makes’ have a look at the other version which totally transforms the cherub into the evil incarnate, Damien from the 1976 film ‘The Omen.



 

Christmas cheer

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With less than a week to go until Christmas day I’m sure many of us are rushing around trying to find the perfect gifts for loved ones. The one gift I have left to buy is one for my father, his sense of humour is much like mine and so I have been searching to find him a good book. These are some I came across and thought I’d share with you.

‘365 Reasons To Be Cheerful,‘ at only £ 5.00 from Marks & Spencers.

‘Peter Kay: The Book,’ at £10.00 from Asda.

‘An Idiot Abroad: The Travel Diaries of Karl Pilkington,’ at only £ 3.86 on Amazon.

Jeremy Clarkson, Round the Bend,’ at £10.00 from Waterstones.

‘ The Fry Chronicles,‘ at £3.86 from Tesco.

‘Comedy Dave’s book,‘ at £5.85 on Amazon.

‘Keith Lemon: The Rules: 69 ways to be successful,’ at £6.25 from Whsmiths.

‘Gangsta Granny,’ at £6.49 from Tesco.

The Inbetweeners Yearbook,’ at £ 8.49 from Whsmiths.

‘Scared of Santa, scenes of Terror in Toyland,’ at £4.55 from Whsmiths.

After the Christmas festivities there’s also the new year to look forward to and so its time to take down the 2011 calendar and search for a replacement to be hung on the wall for another year. Here are some calendars to make you giggle in 2012:

Adult humour calendars.:

Violent Veg X-rated.

Naked male farmers.

Funny Animal calendars:

Goats in trees 2012.

Yoga cats 2012.

Cats in hats 2012.

Penguins at play 2012.

Weird and wonderful:

The 365 stupidest things ever said.

Nuns having fun.

(All available at: http://www.calendarclub.co.uk)

Funny gift ideas.

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It’s only 15 days until Christmas, the only day of the year when you can get utterly inebriated and can eat a whole box of

Christmas tree

My Christmas tree

Quality streets and a full punnet of satsumas without feeling greedy.  The best thing about Xmas is that no matter how old you are you can always appreciate the magic and enjoy the gifts.

The day I realised I was getting old was the day my mum didn’t buy me a chocolate advent calendar. I was devastated especially when she replied with ‘your too old for an advent calendar.’ I made her feel so guilty that she went to the shops to buy me one, but to her disappointment they had all sold out. The digs continued until she felt so bad that she made me my very own advent calendar with little apology notes in each window. I eventually let it go and she now knows never to make that mistake again.

Xmas is a time for giving and receiving and as much as I love this concept it always makes me laugh how stressed everyone gets as they insist on buying all sorts of tack for 4th cousins removed. My mum is a perfect example, every year she buys a range of lavender products for her sister’s cousin’s auntie’s daughter’s mum. My mum also insists on buying a stocking for my two dogs, they love to get in the Xmas spirit.

Muffin my labrador.

Muffin my Xmas labrador.

 
 
 
Gizmo- loving the hat.

Gizmo- loving the hat.

I tend to leave my Xmas shopping  to the very last-minute as I find it very stressful to attempt to push through the busy crowds. These days many people use the internet to do their Xmas shopping, a very wise idea. Out of curiosity I thought I would browse the web to see what gifts were being recommended this Xmas, these were some of the humorous ones I came across:

Random:

Terry the swearing turtle: £ 18.95

Giant animal slippers: £14.95

Personalised Vodka:  £24.95

Mp3 headphone hat: £9.95 (If you want to look cool!)

Elf Christmas jumper: £ 34.95

Solomon Shire rocking horse: £ 279.00 ( I added this to my Xmas list!)

Sat Nag: £7.95

T-shirt folder: 12.95 (One for the guys!)

For the ladies:

Candy bra: Only- £ 5.95.

Make your own chocolate pizza: £12. 95

Hug a Mug: £ 8.95

Personalised adult Romance novel: £24.95

Wicked wax warm massage oil candle: £ 7.95

The pink garden kit: £ 26.95.

For the men:

Gnome soap on a rope: £6.95

Hot pants Hand warmers: £5.95

Wax on Wax off karate car kit: £9.95

Borat mankini: £7.95

Travel John Resealable disposable urinal (3 pack): £6.95

Velcro knife throwing kit: £7. 95

These are just some of the unusual gift ideas I came across (which i’m sure you are all dying to rush out and buy.) If you want some more ideas here are some of the websites I came across when I searched for some funny gift ideas:

http://www.prezzybox.com/christmas-gifts.aspx

http://www.find-me-a-gift.co.uk/christmas-gifts/

http://www.needapresent.com/

In my search for Christmas ideas I also found some rather comical articles also highlighting the wonderful choice of Xmas gifts on offer:

The Guardian: Worst Christmas gift ideas.

The Telegraph: The worst Christmas gifts ever.

Marie Claire- 41 gifts we don’t want for Christmas.

Holidays are coming…

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Christmas is a time to sit back and relax and so I have a researched and compiled a list of Comedy DVD’s and books you can add to your wish list. I have also listed some Christmas feel good films to watch in the cinema.

Top Ten Comedy DVD’s.

1)      Dylan Moran: Yeah Yeah Live in London
2)      Russell Howard’s Live, Right here, Right now.
3)      Greg Davies Live: Firing Cheeseballs at a Dog.
4)      Lee Evans, Roadrunner Live at the 02.
5)      Reginald D Live.
6)      Sarah Millican: Chatterbox Live.
7)     Tim Minchin and the Heritage Orchestra: Live at The Royal Albert Hall
8)      Tim Vine: Jokeamotive
9)      Tommy Tiernan: Crooked Man
10)   Tony Law’s Brainporium

A clutch of autobiographies from leading comedians are expected to be the top best sellers this Christmas, including books by James Corden, Lee Evans, Johnny Vegas and Jason Manford. Other popular ones include:

1)  Rob Brydon’s Small Man in a Book
2)  Julian Clary’s Briefs Encountered
3)  Frankie Boyle’s iconoclastic Work! Consume! Die!
4)  Alan Partridge in I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan
5)  Peter Kay: The Book

 Films showing in the cinema this Christmas:

1) Happy Feet Two. (December 2nd 2011.)
2) Arthur Christmas. (Out already.)
3) A very  Harold and Kumar 3D Christmas. (9th December 2011.)
4)  The  fairies Christmas Ballet. (1st December 2011.)

It can be a stressful time for many having to rush around a busy shopping centre to buy the ideal Christmas gifts for family/friends and partners but it’s also a magical time of the year with plenty of comedy to get you in the Christmas spirit.

Every year I always have a giggle at the Elf Yourself website where you can upload pictures of yourself and friends onto an Elf and watch them dance, it’s a must…take a look at my example 🙂

Elf Yourself